Sleep does wonders for one’s self.

Where I felt useless and terrible last night, I feel significantly better this morning.

I am ready to tackle the day.

Kick some ass.

Be a boss.

Get my ass kicked tonight at the gym.

I think I am most excited about the gym.

I finally signed up with a trainer. So I will be seeing her once a week and getting my butt motivated. I can’t wait!

I have been really enjoying working out, the results I am seeing, how good and how strong I am feeling, and how I can do more and more every day.

It’s a huge mood boost for me. I can honestly say that after the gym is one of the few times that the bitch in my head shuts the fuck up.

You can’t do it

Watch me

I’m nothing if not fucking stubborn to a fault and determined.

I will do it and I will enjoy every minute of it.

It caters a little to my self destructive tendency, however instead of doing something bad like an unhealthy habit, or systematically destroying my relationships, I get to take it out on myself. And the muscle soreness reminds me and keeps me focused.

I am also excited that tomorrow is my last day of work at my current job.

I got a promotion and am going to be significantly closer to home. Like an hour and a half closer. So where all of my energy and time goes to my shitty commute and long hours I won’t have that at my new place. Every if I work long hours, oh well. I am 5 minutes from home.

I am so stinking excited.

I think you are more relieved about it as well, then you let on. I know you get frustrated when I am stressed out, you don’t like it but you don’t say anything. But I can see it on your face.

Concern, worry, a little bit of anger sometimes when I tell you things about my job. You never say it, but I can see it on your face.

You know, you can say something.

You get a say in things Sir.

You don’t want to hold me back or restrict me, but I want just a little bit of that.

I need just a little bit of that. I will let you know when it’s too much.

I am at yet another one of those pivitol turning points in my life.

Everything is going great and I am getting my shit together.

Now I need to keep that momentum and not let that bitch in my head sabotage me like she has been known to do.

You don’t deserve this

Yes I do

Your not smart enough

Yes I am

You’re not good enough

Fuck off yes I am

You will fail

I haven’t yet, and I won’t start now

Your only pretending, your a fake

My resume and credentials say otherwise

I have to keep reminding myself that I am good enough and deserve all of the good things. I work hard at everything I do and if for no other reason, I deserve it because of that.

Today is going to be a good day.